It is time for us to start honouring African wisdom and knowledge. We are our stories. Our being in the world is lived through our connections with family and loved ones. These stories are not always healthy or positive. We were hurt, neglected, abandoned, and abused. Yet as we grow older our brains give us the opportunity to look inward, to reflect, to ponder our life stories. It only comes after 55 to 60 years of age, a time to really take stock and reconsider our youthful reactions to our stories. What we do with that knowledge will pretty much determine how we age. If we can forgive, let go, bless and see the wood for the trees, we will be given new opportunities for growth. If not, we will withdraw inwards more and more and start shutting down instead of embracing the abundance of the universe. And we will become living dead people.
Our internal dialogue and the discourse we engage in will pave the way to contentment, or not.
Life is not easy. Our parents and loved ones did the best with what they had. Very few of them signed up for the roles that they were given. Even fewer had the tools to engage with children who did not t in with the mould. If we now and ourselves outside of the spectrum of the “norm”, we must acknowledge how dif cult this was for our parents or teachers to comprehend and contend with.
Every day is a new opportunity to change our minds. To reconsider. To reflect and to start making new connections with those whom we have left behind. For it is in our “old age” that we will need these loved ones. We will need to feel connected, in spite of a dif cult or abusive childhood. I truly believe that it is never too late to have a happy childhood. Start again – begin to play, learn to play the piano or the guitar. Swim in the ocean. Get a puppy. Start to draw or paint or do ceramics. Be happy.
You cannot replace the love you did not receive. But you can start loving yourself and giving love to those around you. To be kind. To be generous. To laugh. And if you so do, your days will be filled with more than you have ever dreamed of. Believe me. And the isangoma.